Getting Over Myself

I was recently told to get over myself.  What exactly does that mean and how do I go about doing that?  UrbanDictionary.com defines this as a "Patronising phrase used to tell someone that you believe they hold too high an opinion of themselves, or are behaving in a conceited or pompous manner" (an alternate definition is "a phrase little pussies use when they can't win an argument with a real counterpoint").  But I digress.

Holding too high an opinion of myself.....well, on a good day, I would say that I'm a strong woman, an ambitious woman, that I'm honest, full of integrity, loyal, thoughtful, generous, loving, and smart.  On a bad day, I might say I'm overly sensitive, too controlling, too much of a perfectionist, and stubborn.  It's like the little homunculus self you'd see in cartoons - the devil on one shoulder, the angel on the other, both campaigning to direct your choices and actions.  One day I might say I give people too many chances and the next I might say my expectations for others are too high.  Both are true somewhere on the continuum. 

My expectations for others are extremely high, but so are my expectations for myself.  Does getting over myself mean lowering my expectations for the principled living I value?  If I expect less of myself I could definitely get away with lots of things I don't try to get away with now.  It would relieve so many of the burdens I place on myself.  But it would also be a less fulfilling and rewarding life. 

Maybe I am getting over myself.  I'm getting over certain images I had of myself.  I'll give you 3 examples: First, the image of me as a wife, as a stepmom, as one half of a partnership.  I had planned to get married earlier this year (I'll refrain from saying I was supposed to get married, because that implies notions of fate and destiny, and I tend to believe now that God got me on the path where he wanted me).  Second, I'm also getting over seeing myself as a 50/50 co-parent, because I'm not.  My kids are with me all but 2 nights a month.  Third, I'm getting over dreams for a certain career, because it's just not possible to be an on-call midwife when you are the only adult at home with your kids, and you've decided that your kids will always come first.

I'll continue to think about getting over myself and whether there is any merit to that suggestion.  And at the same time, others will get over me as well.