Words are powerful. Words can comfort, reassure, encourage, advise, and soothe. Words can hurt, destroy, insult, and confuse. Words are permanent. Once said, they cannot be deleted or replaced with other words. Every word has a measure of truth, no matter the circumstance, context, or subsequent words.
I treasured the words you spoke to me. I believed them. I believed in them. I believed what you promised, even when your actions suggested otherwise. I wanted to believe. They were beautiful words and beautiful promises. They made me feel loved, valued, cherished, adored, secure, and happy. They mirrored the love I felt for you, leading me to believe our feelings for one another were mutual.
Those words slowly dwindled. They illustrated inconsistencies and created doubt. Then they disappeared altogether as the silence boomed. They were replaced with ugly, hateful, nasty, evil, hurtful words. Hearing the voice that I loved utter them...I'm sure my brows were furrowed, my mouth agape as I tried to wake myself from what I hoped was a nightmare. Hearing those lips curse me, insult me, humiliate me...even in front of my children...I might have preferred that you strike me with your fist. The damage to my heart seemed just as painful.
Ah, but I have a voice too. And now, sweet silence. The ticking of the clock. A beloved dog snoring. A child's gleeful laughter. Music. Birds singing. Thunder booming. Rain pattering. All of it is welcome. All of it is genuine. All of it is restorative.
“That's what careless words do. They make people love you a little less.”
~Arundhati Roy
"Words have no power to impress the mind
without the exquisite horror of their reality."
without the exquisite horror of their reality."
~Edgar Allan Poe
