How Firm Thy Friendship

I attended calling hours tonight for a childhood friend who died unexpectedly this week.  Not surprisingly, I was overcome with memories as I sat with my two closest friends from my childhood and watched the video montage.  There are memories of countless sleepovers and birthday parties, riding bikes, prank calling, and spending nearly every day of summer at the neighborhood pool, longing to grow up quickly as we'd read Seventeen magazine and figure out the best hairstyles and makeup applications.

With hindsight and perspective, I've realized that my childhood was privileged.  Of course, I didn't realize it at the time.  I thought everyone grew up with friends like mine, in a neighborhood like mine, etc.  It's not that nothing bad happened - one of those friends lost a parent at a very young age, while another friend's parents divorced while she was young.  And it's not that we had a lot of material things.  It's that we had QUALITY.  I grew up with loving parents who are still together with 51 years of marriage under their belts.  I also grew up with some really quality friends. in quality families - good, kind, warm, welcoming people.  Just the other night my best high school friend's mom showed up with food and flowers - she'd learned I'd been sick and my friend sent her mom to bless me since she lives too far away to do so in person.  And today, whether it had been a few months or multiple decades since I saw some of these folks, that same genuine core of kindness and warmth was there, even amidst grief and suffering.  It really struck me how blessed my childhood was and how blessed I am.  That I could put my arms around two women who were once the girls I played tag with and tell them that I love them and mean it, even though we seldom see each other or talk.

Within the line of people who'd come to the visitation tonight, a group of boy scouts filed through.  As those boys each paid their respects to the family, they approached one of my friend's sons who was not in the receiving line.  And though the awkwardness was palpable, most of them gave that boy a hug and told him how sorry they were that he lost his mom.  It reminded me yet again of the power of friendships in those formative years, and how they really can last a lifetime.  I hope it's the same for her two sons.

"Waitin' at a stop light yesterday
As a funeral procession made its way through the gates
I watched it roll up a winding road
Through a field of green with white headstones all in a row.
And it made me think about where I'm at
On my not so straight and narrow path,
All the generous and mostly undeserved blessings that I've had...

I had an all-American Mom and Dad,
Some of the coolest friends you could ever have....."

~Jason Aldean, "Good to Go"